When memories flood emotions

Fadzayi Maposah-Correspondent

Life is lived forwards but it is understood backwards. There are things that happen in our lives that we really do not understand when they occur because life is lived in real time. 

Life is like a live broadcast, there are no rehearsals. Like a live broadcast of an event there are opportunities to then watch the recorded version. With life now, the recorded version can be in pictures and the little gifts that we obtain as we go through life. The largest version of the events are in our minds. Our brains are great storage spaces.

When the brain takes us down memory lane, we are reminded of the times that could have made us laugh till we cried, or we cry because we think of the times that we laughed or the very sad times that made us cry.

We have lost friends and relatives along the journey of life. It is sad when we think of the loss. We can however smile faintly when we remember the great ties that we had with the ones we lost. 

I have moments when I think of the people that I lost and I just smile with misted eyes when I remember the love and the times that we shared. 

Our brains are packed with happy and sad memories. The play back in the mind is amazing. 

One can actually feel taken to the particular time that the memory brings. When I think of some memories, I can feel what I felt during the time. The power of memories, they are a treasure. 

Last Sunday was World AIDS Day commemoration.

 The build up to the day had a lot of activities. There were also various activities on the actual day. These days the commemoration is a celebration of hope and the great strides that have been made towards ending AIDS. 

Before World AIDS Day I was asked to make presentations on HIV and AIDS. The one who made a presentation before me laid the foundation for the presentations that were to follow as he discussed the modes of HIV transmission.

I know it is 2024 and there have been many awareness campaigns that have been done in this country. We are getting to 40 years since the first HIV case in 1985. There are however some people who shocked me before and on this day when I made the presentations. I try not to be not easily shocked but at times I feel my eyes widen as I hear what people think. 

Sadly despite the campaigns that have been done there are still levels of stigma and discrimination. One issue that caused a lot of debate is whether one who is HIV negative should get married to one who is HIV positive. 

Emotions ran high as some people thought that this should not be allowed to happen. Some were of the opinion that people who share the same status should just get married and once the statuses were different, it should not be allowed to happen. 

What I liked about the discussions is that it revealed that there are people who are well informed and who are willing to share the information that they have with others. 

From the group, the sentiments were that it is very unfair and it shows levels of stigma and discrimination when people are forced to marry someone who has the same status as them yet there are interventions that allow discordant couples to marry and have children.

As the discussions unfolded, I could pick that there were some who had very bad memories of the first years of HIV and AIDS cases. 

Emotionally some tried to explain to the group how bad HIV and AIDS had been a long time ago. They shared how they had seen relatives, friends, neighbours and colleagues become shadows of what they had been as they lost weight, hair thinned and they developed skin conditions that they had never known existed. 

Others seemed to lose weight overnight while others daily fought diarrhoea , coughing which in most instances was diagnosed as tuberculosis. 

Family and relatives had to commit time to nursing their loved ones and at times without the necessary information and consumables. 

While they were afraid that they too would contract the condition, speaking out was not an option, they could be labelled as having failed to take care of one of their own. As a result, it was just doing a duty while the fear of contracting the infection was high.

Some shared how they had taken their loved ones to hospitals only to be turned away because the hospitals were full and could not take in all who were infected. It seemed the hospitals ranked the illness and those who were still “better” had to be managed at home. 

Babies born to infected mothers did not thrive well and in most cases sadly died. Parents died, their children died too after illnesses that left others emotionally scarred. 

The young people of today cannot relate to this. They have only heard stories because they are living at a time when anti-retroviral therapy is readily available and many people living with HIV have no signs and symptoms. 

The group that I had a discussion with noted that some young people are reckless as far as sexual behaviour is concerned because they know once infected there is medication that some people many years ago did not have access to. 

Sexual behaviour at all times should be responsible. Irresponsible sexual behaviour exposes one to many infections that can become complicated if not treated or managed. Sexual transmission of HIV remains the highest mode of transmission in Zimbabwe.

It is important to ensure that one knows their HIV status and the status of the one that they intend to be intimate with and plan to protect themselves. Sexual intimacy should be done after proper decisions have been made. It is important not to be impulsive sexual beings.